How to Overcome Low Self-esteem

How to Overcome Low Self-esteem

My previous posts are detailed and full of bits of advice, recommendations, and tips on how to
stand out and be comfortable in your skin. While I cannot stress enough the importance of self-confidence, we cannot also deny the existence of low self-esteem. But hopefully, this article should help you on how to overcome low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem can creep up on you unannounced and make you doubt how you look, how you talk, make you question your hours of prepared speech and self-worth. Low self-esteem is a very tricky topic to discuss because it has a lot to do with your psychology and how you measure your worth in respect to what you might define as the normal standard which is directly or indirectly influenced by what society have set as a standard of conduct.

I am not a professional sociologist, but an individual like you working on her self-esteem, so if you feel extremely negative about yourself or your life, I recommend you see a professional in the field.


Tips I Have Researched to Help You Manage Your Low Self-esteem

1. Practicing Positive Affirmation Helps to Overcome Low Self-esteem

We all have that tiny voice that always screams out loud when we are trying something new, and when you are battling low self-esteem, that voice seems to scream louder than ever. This calls for daily positive affirmation. Make it a habit of telling yourself positive words every day. Before starting any new project, focus on your strength and achievements and keep picturing them in your mind while telling yourself you are a winner and you are going to excel in everything you put your mind to.

2. Failures are Parts of Growth

Never beat yourself hard for failing; if you have never failed in life, then you have not started your journey to success. Always accept that failure is a part of life and failing does not mean you are a loser and might never be better, you failing simply means you are human just like everyone else and on a path to achieving greater things.
“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

3. Look Inward to Discover the Cause of Your Low Self-esteem

You cannot overcome low self-esteem if you do not have an honest talk with yourself. Most people battling low self-esteem are victims of emotional abuse from family, loved ones, colleagues, or random strangers. Have a one-on-one conversation with yourself; dissect all the words, names, and attributes you have been associated with and list out your strengths, and compare to see how these negative attributes do not line with who you truly are. It‟s your life so write your scripts.

4. Look at the Bigger Picture

As a perfectionist, I cannot stress how overthinking every situation, conversation or circumstance can ruin so many things for you. Ignore those tiny little words and stop overthinking what never and might not happen and focus on the bigger picture. Find peace and look beyond every situation.

5. To Overcome Low Self-esteem Stop the Comparison

You might wake up at the right side of the bed, excited about the day ahead, and all of a sudden feel low because you ran a thought in your head comparing yourself with friends, family members, or random online strangers you have and might never meet again. Clear your head and mind and focus on the moment. We are beautifully unique in our way.

6. Doing What You Love the Most Helps to Overcome Low Self-esteem

This final tip always works for me. Doing what you love gives you a boost of confidence and excitement which is all you need to feel better about your self-esteem. Discover your talent and hobby, set achievable goals and pursue your dreams, and don‟t look back.

Conclusion

When it comes to topics concerning overcoming low self-esteem, there are never enough tips to recommend to you to help you overcome this temporary weakness. You are not alone on the journey of low self-esteem,

According to a book by Dr. Joe Rubino titled The self-esteem book, 85% of the world’s populations are affected by low self-esteem.

Don’t beat yourself, think positive about yourself, focus on your strengths, work on your weakness and do what you love doing. Furthermore, what are the things you love doing that boost your self-esteem?

10 Great Ways to Be a Role Model for Your Child

10 Great Ways to Be a Role Model for Your Child

If your child has never said to you; “I will love to be like you someday”, it’s an obvious sign you’re lagging in your parenting duty. Parents are the first contact of a child. In other words, children are configured to watch and learn from their parents. Perhaps, you’re still thinking about how to be a role model for your child? Relax, this post is for you. 

Being a role model is the most powerful form of educating.

John wooden

Hence, utilize your position as a parent in your child’s life. However, before we go into how to be a role model for your child. We should understand who is a role model.

Who is a Role Model?

A role model is someone worthy of imitation by others either in character, career, academic, relationship or financially. Also, one is said to be a role model when positive, commendable traits are evident in that person’s life.

10 Ways to Be a Role Model For Your Child

1. Self-Examination

Hey parents!

You know yourself better than anyone else. I’m sure that deep within you there are certain behavioural traits that you aren’t proud of. If that’s your struggle, it’s time to work on yourself. Start by making a list of all the negative traits you want to get rid of, next, a list of all the positive traits you love to develop. Your level of discipline determines your rate of change. Besides, don’t expect a 24hour instant transformation, because change is a progressive process.

2. Develop an Optimistic Attitude

People tend to repel those with pessimistic discouraging attitudes.

Likewise, your kids can tell when you’re optimistic about life and hoping for the best. This attitude imprints into their heart confidence and trust in you as their parents. They start believing that no matter how things get rough, you would always find a way out of it. Instead of giving in to self-pity, depression, and unhappiness.

3. Lead by Example

How often do you instruct your kids to do the right thing, then as a parent you find yourself doing the opposite? Your nonchalant attitude towards doing the right thing says a lot to your kids. They begin to question the instructions given to them. Kids love to see you take the first step then they follow.

Don’t advise your kids to live on a healthy diet whereas as a parent you eat junk food. They are watching you. Also, not leading by example is one of the biggest Parenting mistakes you should avoid. 

4. Avoid a Life of Pretence 

Do you want to be your child’s role model? If yes, quit living a fake life and be real. Why do all the good stuff in front of your kids than in their absence reverse is the case?. Certainly, when your kids find out you’re not who they thought you were, you’ve succeeded in tarnishing your reputation before them. 

Since they don’t know the real you, why should they imitate you? Also, always tell your kids about your past and things happening around you and within the family. Be open-minded, keep no secrets. Furthermore, as you begin to share your personal experiences with your kids, they also tell you things about themselves.

In addition, learn how to recognize your emotions, which helps you relate effectively with your kids.

5. Be the Best at What You Do

As a parent be the best version of yourself, strive to be the best you can be in all your endeavors. Your kids are watching you. And your excellent performance at work, sport, career, and other fields will speak for you. As your kids learn to know how successful you’re at so many things, they become proud of you and desire to become like you someday.

Always work hard to obtain that promotion, reward, recommendation, and applause. It pays off when others give positive testimonies concerning you in the presence of your kids.

6. Be Your Kid’s Hero

Ensure that your kids can count on you at all times. Learn to be there for your kids, pay attention to their complaints and provide solutions. Don’t abandon your kids because of your quest for possessions, spend quality time with them. Check out how to increase the love bond with your child.

Furthermore, listen to them, consider their opinion, support them, desire the best for your kids and help them grow into the best version of themselves. 

7. Discipline Your Kids in Love

In how to be a role model for your child, love is an important factor that should be given much consideration. It’s out of the love you have for your kids that you’re able to make sacrifices to ensure they grow. Indeed, the craving of every parent is to see their child succeed. To achieve this, your endless encouragement is required.

As your kids begin to feel the impact of your encouragement in their life, their response will be gratitude, respect, and honor to you as their parents. Also, when you discipline them for their wrongs let love influence your actions, not anger. Check out the correct way to discipline your child.

8. Maintain a Healthy Relationship

How is your relationship with your spouse and others? Do your interactions with them portray peace, unity, and understanding? The way you relate to other people in the presence of your kids matters.

Hence, be mindful of the way you relate with others.

Consider Ahmed’s story

Ahmad grew up in an unsettled home, every day he watches his parent’s exchange words and oftentimes result in physical violence. Little did they know their behaviors were gaining advanced effect on their son. Ahmad grew to view fighting and quarreling as a normal way of settling disputes when someone offenses you. One day at school, he had a misunderstanding with his fellow student. 

Ahmad felt he was right and deserved an apology. The other student felt the same way. But Ahmad chose to have his way through violence. This act got him into lots of trouble. In the counselor’s office, when his parents were called for their child’s actions. It became obvious he had learned such an act of violence from his parents. It dawns on his parents that they had influenced their child in the wrong way and need to make amends before things get out of control. In other words, as a parent, you either influence your child positively or negatively.

9. Teach Your Child Core Values of Life

Regularly sit with your child to advise them. Teach them about acceptable and unacceptable traits. Likewise, the rewards for each trait. Tell them stories about things that had happened in your life and how you overcame them.

This is necessary, it enables them to learn from your mistakes and avoid such.

10. Be committed to Making Your Kids Happy

Your kid’s happiness should bring you Joy. Therefore, discard behaviors that make them sad. Such behaviors include unnecessary yelling, showing less interest in their passion, restricting them, comparing them to their peers, and imposing your will on them.

In contrast, create a conducive atmosphere for your kids to express themselves, go shopping together, visit interesting places, buy them gifts on their birthdays, reward and commend them when they do things right.

Conclusion

Don’t engage in activities that will create hatred between you and your child. This is vital because if the atmosphere becomes hostile how to be a role model for your child becomes difficult and unachievable. Love your kids and desire the best for them. This will convince them that the perfect role model they can have is their parents.

Moreover, as a parent what are some of the ways you have influenced your kids?

If You Notice These 7 Signs, You Might Have Breast Cancer

If You Notice These 7 Signs, You Might Have Breast Cancer

Breast cancer is an abnormal growth of cells in the mammary gland. Mostly affects the inner lining of the milk duct and the lobules that supply them with milk. However, the signs and symptoms of breast cancer are more pronounced compared to other types of cancer. Breast Cancer is commonly found among women and rare in men. 

According to the National breast cancer foundation, there are four types of breast cancer depending on which cell in the breast turns to cancer. Hence, in the post, I will be sharing the major signs and symptoms of breast cancer.

What are Some of the Signs and Symptoms of Breast Cancer?

1. Development of Lump in the Breast

A breast lump is a swell or bumps in the breast usually hard, unevenly shaped, immobile and different from other surroundings of breast tissues.

2. Rashes Around or on the Nipples

This is the outburst of bumpy irritations and spots with a dry surface around one’s nipple.

3. Discharge of Blood from the Breast

Associated with breastfeeding mother’s, whereby traces of blood are seen mixed with breast milk indicating breast cancer.

4. Changes in Breast Shapes and Sizes

To notice this sign and symptom of breast cancer, you must be familiar with the shape and size of your breast to be able to tell when there is a change.

5. Severe Pain in the Breast

 When you begin to experience persistent pain in the breast, don’t assume it’s a mere pain. Visit the doctor immediately!

6. Swollen Lymph Nodes in the Neck or Armpit

This is a noticeable sign and symptom of breast cancer. The lymph nodes act as filters that collect and destroy bacteria and viruses. Lymph nodes multiply rapidly when they fight infections in the body such as cancer, causing them to swell.

7. Nipple Becomes Inverted

Of course, women are having naturally inverted nipples. But it becomes a sign of breast cancer when your normal nipple such as small, protruding, flat, bumpy, puffy, and big suddenly become inverted.

Treatment for Breast Cancer

1. Surgery

The surgical method applied in the removal of breast cancer depends on the extent of the tumour. During surgery part of the tumour and nearby tissue is removed.

This is because the complete removal of the tumour results in damage to the breast.

2. Radiation Therapy 

Employs high radiation to terminate, shrink and slow the growth of a cancerous cell in the breast by damaging their DNA. Preferable carried out during the early stages of the tumour. This method is done by either external means which involves the use of a machine to send radiation to a specific part affected by cancer whereas the internal method entails the insertion of radioactive substances in the form of seeds, ribbons or capsules in the breast. 

3. Chemotherapy

This method uses certain kinds of drugs to terminate the growth and spread of cancerous cells in the breast. These sets of drugs are prescribed based on the type and nature of cancer. Chemotherapy drugs are active agents in damaging the DNA of the cancerous cell. They include temozolomide, cyclophosphamide, cytarabine, melphalan among others.

4. Herbal Treatment

Natural herbal products are employed in combating cancer. They help in stimulating the immune system which in turn fight cancerous cells most especially vegetables and fruits.

This herb includes Turmeric, ginger, garlic, laetrile saffron, oregano, and cayenne pepper. Moreover, nuts and extra virgin oil has been proven to reduce the rate of breast cancer.

What are the Preventive Measures Against Breast Cancer?

1. Avoid Alcohol Intake

Ethanol(Pure alcohol) contains acetaldehyde which causes damage to cells by binding itself to the DNA leading to cell replication incorrectly.

2. Have a Balanced Body Weight

The rapid increase in one body size promotes the growth of cancerous cells in the breast. Therefore, it’s advised you reduce the number of calories consumed and engage more in aerobics activities.

3. Avoid Post-menopausal Hormones

 Indeed postmenopausal hormones are useful in preventing diseases associated with the menopause stage. The same can increase the growth of cancer in the breast.

Hence, consult your doctor beforehand.

4. Breast-feeding Significantly Reduces the Risk of Breast Cancer

Breastfeeding is helpful for breastfeeding mothers, including in the reduction of breast cancer risk. In a nutshell, you shouldn’t refuse to breastfeed your child within the infant age.

5. Avoid Birth Control Pills

Research has proven that pills are taken to prevent pregnancy often have an adverse effect on the breast promoting breast cancer.

Conclusion

All the mentioned signs and symptoms of breast cancer must be taken seriously. When signs persist visit the hospital for a proper check-up. Furthermore, don’t engage in self-medication without proper knowledge of the type of breast cancer.

Also, share your thought about breast cancer in the comment section below.

6 Natural Ways to Avoid Diabetes

6 Natural Ways to Avoid Diabetes

The increasing rate of diabetes is alarming, resulting in about 1.6million death yearly, with its major percentage amongst developing countries, Nigeria included. Both young and old can be a victim. Therefore, how to prevent diabetes is the question asked by the majority, because the aftermath of diabetes when not treated gives rise to other detrimental diseases. Such as blindness, kidney failure, stroke, damaged nervous system, heart attack, and amputation of the lower limb.

However, before we look at how to prevent diabetes, it’s best we understand what diabetes is all about, its types, and likewise, what causes it.

What is Diabetes?

Diabetes is a metabolic disease also known as diabetes mellitus. This occurs when the body’s glucose or sugar is high. It all begins with the inability of the pancreas to produce enough insulin. Responsible for transporting glucose from the body to the cell to be used as energy or stored. Likewise, when the body experiences difficulty in using the insulin produced effectively. The two-process leads to the accumulation of sugar in the body resulting in diabetes.

What Causes Diabetes?

Medically, the main cause of diabetes stems from damaged insulin in charge of regulating body sugar. As the body’s immune system fights infection and other diseases bacteria and viruses attack the insulin and when it weakens it becomes difficult to transport sugar.

Obvious symptoms include blurred vision, fatigue, increased thirst, frequent urination, and infections.

Types Of Diabetes

1. Type I diabetes

The inability of the pancreas to produce insulin causing high storage of glucose in the body. Type I diabetes affects more children and young adults. 

2. Type II Diabetes

This occurs when the body resists insulin. Whereby, it fails to use produced insulin efficiently, causing glucose to build up in the bloodstream. However, type II diabetes affects adults above 45years.

3. Gestational Diabetes

This type of diabetes is common amongst pregnant women. Experience when insulin blocks hormones during pregnancy, the aftermath is the accumulation of sugar in the body. Affects both the mother and child.

How to Prevent Diabetes

1. Minimize Sugar Intake

A high intake of sugar and sugary products such as; chocolates, candies, yoghurts, sugary soda drinks, and ice cream boosts the likelihood of diabetes. Most especially when the body cell becomes resistant to insulin’s actions.

Glucose broken down from that food is unable to circulate across the cell, hence, is absorbed into your bloodstream.

2. Maximize Fiber Intake

Fibre products do the opposite of surgery products. Instead of increasing the body sugar, it helps keep the blood sugar and insulin low. Also, can be used to keep one’s weight in check. Preferably insoluble fibre which doesn’t absorb water. The more natural and unprocessed a food product is the higher its fibre content.

Foods with high fibre include; pear, strawberries, barley, avocado, carrots, nuts, peas, beans, potatoes, wholegrain, and wheat. 

3. Avoid Smoking

How to prevent diabetes also entails abstinence from smoking. It contains carbon monoxide (CO) which replaces oxygen in the blood, making other organs starved of oxygen.

Smoking leads to heart disease, cancer of the breast, lungs, and likewise prostate. However, research has proven that about 60% of smokers have a high risk of diabetes.

4. Engage More in Exercise

Effective work-out increases the function of insulin. The more sensitive your insulin becomes to glucose, it will be able to transport glucose from the blood to the cells. Likewise, those living with abdominal fat can also employ exercise methods to burn out fast. This is essential as abdominal fat increases inflammation and causes the body to resist insulin.

Other methods of losing abdominal fat are; healthy diet, reduced alcohol intake, and aerobics exercise.

5. Natural Herbs Helps Prevent Diabetes

They are categories of natural herbs which are used to increase insulin sensitivity to carry out its function of sugar regulations effectively. Also, decreased fats, support digestion, improves blood glucose level and concentration.

These herbs include aloe vera, bitter melon, ginger, cinnamon, and fenugreek.

6. Take in Lots of Vitamin D

The level of vitamin D in the body determines the amount of sugar absorbed by the body and transported to cells. One of the roles of vitamin D in the body is to strengthen the insulin when damaged by bacteria and viruses.

Sources of vitamin D are fatty fish, cod liver oil, egg yolk, mushrooms, and sunlight.

Final Words

How to prevent diabetes should be preferred above its treatments which are demanding. You shouldn’t wait until you experience its symptoms or when diagnosed with diabetes before applying preventive measures. It’s advisable to include the above methods as part of your routine. These healthy habits in turn will boost your immune system to fight other harmful diseases.

Also, share with us how this post was helpful to you in the comment section below.

6 Natural How to Prevent Diabetes

Every Thing You Need to Know About Emotional Intelligence

Every Thing You Need to Know About Emotional Intelligence

Previously, an intelligence quotient  (IQ) was all it required to elevate you up the ladder of success in all endeavours, but that’s becoming insufficient as the spread of civilization sparks creativity in the minds of humans. To seek ways of understanding themselves, others, and their world. Also, learn how to manage their emotions effectively for maximum benefits. Therefore, to augment your IQ, you need to develop your emotional intelligence(EI) which can be learned.

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

This is the ability to recognize, understand, use, manage and communicate your emotions positively. Having high emotional intelligence enables you to coordinate yourself, reduce stress, balance your activities, and communicate effectively. Furthermore, understand what others are going through, think through your challenges, make profitable decisions and adjust to evolving environmental changes either at home or work.

What are the Components of Emotional Intelligence?

Daniel Goleman,  an American psychologist, proposed that there are five components of emotional intelligence.

1. Self–Awareness

What is emotional intelligence in terms of self-awareness? This is the consciousness and vivid understanding of what is happening with and around you. A moment of realizing your strengths and weaknesses, also, the effects produced when one is becoming predominant over the other.

2. Self-Regulation

Self-awareness paves the way for self-regulation. The ability to subject your emotions under your control. For instance, choosing to stay happy more often than getting angry at every slight provocation. 

3. Motivation

The zeal to pursue your set goals and objectives notwithstanding the obstacles and oppositions. This aspect of emotional intelligence creates a sense of focus, quality self-standard, and re-examination of our pursuit.

4. Empathy

Beyond understanding yourself and managing your emotions. You need to come to the sense of discerning and interpreting how others around you are feeling. This will guide you on how to interact with people and speak to their needs. In essence, it entails that you picture yourself in what others are experiencing and how you can cope with their challenges.

5. Social Skills

A man by nature is a social being. To survive we need one and another. That’s where social skills or awareness comes into the picture. This component will guide you to manage, associate, and interact with people irrespective of their social, cultural, and political background.

Test For Emotional Intelligence

Being familiar with what is emotional intelligence is not enough to turn your life for the better. You need to take a test to know your level of EI and what to do to enhance your EI. Hence, emotional intelligence can be measured based on Daniel Goleman’s four-quadrant competency model 2002. These are self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship awareness. Usually, the questions asked are centred on one understanding himself and others.

Let’s see on a scale of 1-10 you scored below 4 in your EI test, which means your EI is low. If it falls within the range of 5-7 it means your EI is on medium level and when your score is 8upwards it shows you have high emotional intelligence. Make sure to test your emotional intelligence.

Importance of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is seen as the first step to understand your true potential. It helps you stand out amid others, it’s like an aroma of attraction that distinguishes you for greater opportunities. Research has shown that people with high EI have greater mental health, job performance, leadership skills, and healthy relationships. This is made possible because they can maximize their strength over their weak traits. 

How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

1. Consciousness of Mood Enhances Emotional Intelligence

Nobody was born with the power to manage anger, stress, fear, and lots of negative emotions. Rather, they commit to learning how to stay on top of their emotions and manipulate it to their benefit. Likewise, your emotional intelligence will rapidly increase when you commit yourself to gain consciousness of your mood.

2. Activating Your Emotional Intelligence Requires a Positive Mindset/Attitude.

Improvise means of staying positive. A positive mindset supplies the body with positive energy to cope with stress and thinks right. It helps you focus more on developing your strength than heeding to your weaknesses. A positive attitude can be gotten from what you feed your minds with, therefore be deliberate about what goes into your mind.

3. Accelerating Your Listening Skills Boost Emotional Intelligence 

Effective listening skills are one of the quickest ways to understand others. This is because while humans speak you can sense from their tone and body expression if they are happy, sad, disturb, bored, uncomfortable, the list is endless.

Once you pay more attention to listening, you become familiar with socializing with others in the right way. Myself as an example; I don’t start telling someone about how my day went when tiredness is boldly written on their faces. Rather, I make myself useful, probably fix something for them to eat before they take a nap.

4. Communication as a Vital Ingredient in Boosting Intelligence

The thing is this if you don’t talk more with people you are going to have a hard time managing them with little or no teamwork ability. Experiencing difficulties communicating? Start by applying the 7C’s of communication.

5. Goal Setting Helps to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

Your emotions seem to be gaining control over you because you have failed to organize your life. Learn to loosen your day-to-day schedule with practical steps on accomplishing them. Goal setting keeps you motivated and focused. Also, trash out stress and confusion out of your menu.

Books On Emotional Intelligence

1. Think Again: The Power Of Knowing What You Don’t Know By Adam Grant

As the title implies Adams teaches that for one to fit into the advancing world certain ideology which is unprofitable must be unlearned. And also embrace mental flexibility to learn other valuable cognitive skills. 

2. Emotional Intelligence For Sales Leadership: The Secret To Building High-Performance Sales Teams By Colleen Stanley

This book outlines soft skills needed to increase sales performance. It helps you connect business-to-business, business-to-customers and also create sales culture and teams.

3. Emotional Intelligence In The Workplace

How To Use Emotional Intelligence To Build Strong Relationships And Thrive In Your Career By Mark Craemer. In this book you would learn the power of connection, collaboration for success, and how to build a reputation.

4. Handbook Of Social And Emotional Learning: Research and practice by Ed. Durlak et. at

If you are a parent and much interested in building your child’s emotional intelligence to augment their intelligence quotient. I recommend your purchase.

5. Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

Here Travis unveiled the secrets of what is emotional intelligence and its role in our success. He gave step-by-step methods to increase emotional intelligence via the four main Components of EI discussed earlier.

6. The Emotional Intelligence quick book by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

These two authors are the founder of Talentsmart. In this very book, they explained how you can manage your emotions positively to accomplish goals, decrease stress and increase productivity.

7. Working with your Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

In this book, Daniel steps beyond what is the emotional intelligence to outline the application of EI in our everyday life. Most especially for bosses, CEO, managers, and those in leadership. Interested in increasing your emotional intelligence as a boss or leader?

Conclusion

Emotional Intelligence was never designed for a certain group of persons, but it’s meant for everyone irrespective of your status. Like we have previously seen, to increase your relevance at work, home, and business you need to increase your emotional intelligence to support your intelligent quotient.

Conclusively, share what you think concerning emotional intelligence in the comment section.

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