by Happiness Hassan | Apr 21, 2021 | Family & Parenting
As a parent, I assume there were things you wished your parents had taught you while growing up. Also, there was the hurtful treatment you received from them, that you wished you could reverse. Back then I’m sure you had promised yourself to become a better version of your parents to your kids. In this post, I will share 8 parenting mistakes to avoid while handling your kids.
Currently, the ball of parenting is in your court, instead of finding it easy and interesting as you’ve imagined. Reverse the case, you’re struggling to keep up with parenting. Indulging in all forms of parenting mistakes to avoid while grooming a child. The role of parenting is tasking and requires courage to get it right.
8 Parenting Mistakes Every Parent Must Avoid
1. Do Not Be Mr. and Mrs. Busy Outfit
There is a natural urge in parents to provide the necessities of life for their family and there is nothing wrong with that. But in that process, the majority abandon their kids to grow and look after themselves. Perhaps, hand them over to a nanny or a relative to look after while they are engrossed in their jobs, career, business, and personal issues. This approach is dangerous and affects your kids negatively.
As parents never sacrifice the well-being of your kids for a job that’s extremely demanding and takes you away from them. If that continues their needs and wants will become unnoticeable to you. Hence, spend more time with them by balancing your schedule.
In short, your kid’s happiness is your priority as a parent. That implies being there for them. The more you distance yourself from your kids, the love bond begins to fade, and gradually they see you as a stranger. Clinging unto whoever spends more time with them.
2. Imposing Your Will on Your Kids
Conflict of interest creates disunity in a family. Parents assume they know what suits their kids best, without considering their kid’s opinions. That’s wrong, it kills a child’s creativity and freedom. Furthermore, it also steals their happiness.
Yes! You have a right to make choices for your kids, still, that be open to hearing theirs. Instead of imposing, attempt in convincing them with reasons why their choice may not profit them and how yours would benefit them more. For instance, instead of imposing your choice of career on them, ask them their ambitions.
3. Do Not Compare Your Kids!
Comparing your kids to someone is one of the biggest parenting mistakes to avoid. Psychologically when you compare your child to others or their siblings you’re hampering their performance most especially academically. As a present cultivate the habit of embracing and celebrating your kid’s uniqueness. Do you want your child to improve? If yes, make them believe in themselves by showing how proud you are of them.
Malam Usman and his wife had a son who experiences difficulty in spelling and reading fluently. Whereas, his younger siblings were exceptionally brilliant. Rather than comparing him, perhaps highlighting his disability, they chose to encourage him and got him an English tutor, which is the right way to raise a child with a disability.
To their amazement, he picked up so fast and became eloquent in spelling and reading. If you observe closely, this couple didn’t pressure their son through comparison. Employ these tactics as a parent.
4. One Mistake You Could Do as a Parent Is Not Leading by Example
This is another parenting mistake to avoid when handling your kids. As a parent, know that you’re a role model to your kids. Don’t expect them to do as you say while they watch you do the opposite. The way you live your life as a parent is reflected in the upbringing of your kids.
There are certain behaviours, you shouldn’t display in front of your kids, such as quarreling as a couple. It’s wrong and destabilizes your kids. I advise if there is a misunderstanding between you and your partner learn to settle it in private and not in the presence of your kids.
Also, avoid taking hard drugs or harmful substances while telling your kids they are hazardous to their health. Lead by example as a parent, not by mare instructions.
5. It’s Wrong to Ignore Your Kids Passion
Kids are creative and love to explore. As loving parents, one of the gifts you can offer to your child is supporting and promoting their passion, this can be artworks, crafts, singing, dancing, writing, and more. How then can you support them and become their biggest fan when you can’t tell where their passion lies?
Most times, they even walk up to you and showcase their talents. How do you react as a parent? Let’s see, you push them aside, give flimsy excuses, show less interest, ask them to stop bothering you, and come back later.
All these behaviours are parenting mistakes to avoid as much as possible. Next time, when your kid walks up to you, suspend whatever you’re doing at the moment and show some concern. This includes their school work.
6. Extreme Punishment and Under-discipline
Parents often find it conflicting to differentiate between disciplining and punishing their kids. Of course, when they do what’s wrong they should be corrected appropriately, that draws their attention to why they are being punished. However, in that process, some parents may end up inflicting injuries on their children due to anger. It isn’t profitable to discipline a child out of anger it often results in something outrageous.
In that case, how should you discipline your kids? It is simple, corporal punishment should be avoided, your punishment should be on a minimal scale.
Afterwards, sit with that child, explain why they were punished and what is expected of him next time. This must be done in love.
7. One Mistake Parents Make is Trying to Raise Perfect Kids
There isn’t any perfect being in the world. Rather there is plenty of room for improvement. That’s the mindset you need as a parent when training your kids.
The moment you begin to foresee high expectations from your kids, indirectly you’re paving the way for hatred and bitterness towards your child when they don’t meet up to your set standard.
8. Shying Away From Sex-Talk
This is one of the parenting mistakes to avoid. As a parent, if you don’t advise your kids on the right way to go about sex in our crazy world, chances are; they get to hear it from other sources which may portray sex in the wrong manner to them. I see nothing wrong in teaching your kids purity and chastity before marriage.
This advice would help your kids become better tomorrow even while they are away from you. They should learn about the consequences and damages that are involved in premarital sex and also how to keep themselves away from such.
Also, create time to advise your kids, teach them acceptable characters to imitate and the ones to discard. Train them to stand for what’s right. And no matter the circumstances they should learn not to compromise their standard.
Conclusion
Being strict with your kids is never going to change or solve anything, learn to become their best friend. Likewise, limiting your kids is another parenting mistake to avoid. Don’t confine them to the walls of your house, allow them to explore and learn other aspects of life.
Share with us other parenting mistakes you feel People should avoid.
by Happiness Hassan | Apr 16, 2021 | Family & Parenting
I need you to picture yourself arriving late for an appointment. Unfortunately, you lost the contract you’ve worked hard for. Heading back home in disappointment, it begins to rain, while hurrying to take shelter, a reckless driver drove past you and spilt muddy water on your outfit. What would be your mood at that instance? An ample number of persons give in to anger, transfer of aggression, retaliating with harsh words, smashing valuables, oftentimes shedding tears to let the pain out.
However, your body and mood begin to return to normality after you’ve relaxed, perhaps taken a nap. You start seeking encouragement to comfort yourself, while in that process, flashbacks on the damages you did a few hours ago start replaying in your head, and you wonder “how on earth did you do all that”? Most times you feel you’re been manipulated by an unknown force and can’t find an explanation. Well, the resultant effect of your mood at all times is controlled by your emotions. Therefore, it’s necessary to know how to recognize emotions, likewise learn to manage them to prevent hurting yourself and others.
What are Emotions?
Emotions are intense feelings with biological origin resulting from neuropsychological changes in the human body. Connected with one’s temperament, behaviour, personality, thoughts, moods, creativity, and motivation.
Where Does Emotion Come From?
Psychologists believe emotions are the results of changes within the body, derived from the heart. While neurologists proposed that emotions are produced by the brain. The brain coordinates everything within the body including emotions.
The brain contains a limbic system that houses various tissues in charge of controlling emotions, also, emotions are coded into the DNA. These issues include;
The hypothalamus which is in charge of sexual response, hormone release, and temperature regularly
The amygdala regulates responses to things happening around such as fear and pleasure.
The hippocampus is responsible for preserving and retrieving memories.
There limbic cortex controls mode, inspiration, motivation, and judgment.
Why Are Emotions Important?
Humans rarely pay attention to their feelings until it gets out of control. The decisions you make daily are influenced by your emotions. Likewise, Our response to our environment and situation around.
Mastering your emotions prevents hurts and enables you to coordinate yourself. If your emotions control you, definitely your entire life becomes disarranged. How to recognize emotions are necessary to aid you to control them and channel your energy in the right direction.
Categories Of Emotions
1. Negative Emotions
These are sets of feelings, behaviour, and response which inflict discomfort, pain, and damages on the initiator and those around. Once these emotions begin to control a person, his energy is channelled in the wrong direction.
Furthermore, staying on negative emotions for long increases stress hormones and eventually affects your health negatively. How to recognize emotions with negative effects are easy to spot on the surface and is controlled majorly by the amygdala. There are so many types of negative emotions;
1. Anger
A state of displeasure and hostility. Control by the amygdala in the brain. There is a release of a chemical known as catecholamines which leads to an outburst of energy. Signs of anger include;
- Sweaty palms
- Frown looks
- Forming fist
- Increase in heartbeat
- Grinding of teeth
- Clenching jaw
- Shaking and trembling
- Sarcastic responses
- Yelling and shouting
- Depression
- Absence of humor.
2. Fear
This is a state of being terrified and uncomfortable induced by someone or something. To recognize fear lookout for the following;
- Rapid Heartbeat
- Sweating uncontrollably
- Raised of eyebrows
- Discomfort in the stomach
- Trembling
- Nervousness
- Short breath
- Quick short movement.
3. Sadness
A mental disorder with a feeling of depression, unhappiness, and worthlessness. Oftentimes, when things don’t go as planned sadness steps in. Likewise, when one experiences a loss. Methods use in recognizing that one is sad includes;
- Self-isolation
- Lack of focus/concentration
- Unenthusiastism
- Tiredness
- Moody looks
- Despair
- Too much sleep or lack of sleep
- Quietness
- Loss of interest
- Emptiness
- Tearful
4. Jealousy
It’s a feeling of resentment, envy, fear, and insecurity towards someone or something. This is caused by low self-esteem. Signs of jealousy include;
- Giving of false compliment
- Hatred
- Quick to criticize
- Judgmental
- Unnecessary show-off
- Unhealthy comparison
- Celebrate failure
- Ignore achievement
5. Loneliness
Research shows that adults above 65 years feel the heat of loneliness more. Loneliness is a feeling of separation and abandonment. How to recognize emotions displaying loneliness include;
- Sleeplessness
- Unproductiveness
- Drawn to possession
- Negative thought system
- Easily gets annoyed
- Frequent illness
- Tiredness
- Cut-off from others.
2. Positive Emotions
These are sets of pleasurable sensations that are always desirable. Once activated it brings peace and enthusiasm. It erases a pessimistic attitude, gives your reasons to live, reasons to help others, and guides you to make profitable decisions. Also, it’s a feeling of gratitude, influenced by the amygdala in the limbic system. There are so many types of positive emotions.
1. Happiness
I honestly think happiness is being present and finding joy in every moment
Aimee Marino
Therefore, Happiness is a choice to maintain inner peace despite your current circumstances. How to recognize true happiness entails;
- Open-minded
- Worrying less
- Thankfulness
- Supportive/Encouraging
- Living in the moment
- Celebrate good
- Enjoy nature
- Love/value yourself
- Laughing out loud
2. Contentment
A neurological feeling of happiness and satisfaction with one’s current stage of life while hoping for something higher. Signs to note about contentment includes;
- Being true to yourself
- Setting your needs within your financial carrying capacity
- Humility
- Confidence in one strength And talent
- Cheerful mood
- Been realistic
- Healthy routine
- Lack of envy and greed
3. Love
It’s an emotional feeling of affection and attraction towards someone or something which propels you to the extent of sacrificing your all to see them happy.
Hence, they are included as one of your priorities. To tell if you’re in love or someone loves you, check out for the following signs;
- Selflessness
- Spending time with loved ones
- Constant thought about what you love
- Notice every little change about that person or thing.
- Speak about that person/thing all the time.
- Cherish and values that person/thing.
- Openness
- Feeling of happiness around that person/things.
- Been caring
4. Trust
It’s the state of dependability and reliability on someone or in your ability. Signs of trust includes;
- Respect boundaries
- Commitment
- Gratitude.
- Confident
- Loyalty
- Doesn’t compromise
- Forgives easily
- Consistency
5. Positive Anticipation
This is an eager expectation for an upcoming event. Positive anticipation induces emotions to cope with stress and disappointment.
How to recognize positive anticipation emotions is often trickish because not everyone can differentiate between positive or negative anticipation. Signs include;
- Hyper activeness
- Cognizant
- Positive thought
- Happiness
- Planning and orderliness
- Been nervous
- Hope
- Alertness
How To Manage Emotions
In addition to how you can recognize your emotions, here are ways to control them most especially the negative emotions.
1. Give Yourself Space
The moment you discover two to three signs of your predominant emotions is displaying, deep within you, you’re aware of the usual out-burst around people.
Immediately, excuse yourself from among others to prevent further retaliation, especially signs of anger and jealousy.
2. Develop a Thankful Heart
Don’t spend your entire day complaining about what isn’t right, use that period to appreciate the wonderful things in your life, around you, and in the lives of others.
A thankful heart is an antidote to loneliness and sadness.
3. Take control of Your Emotions
Your emotions are subjected to your will depending on how you use them. For instance when the light goes off, usually you begin to panic due to darkness.
However, don’t give in to fear, decide to take control and search for the nearest source of light, probably your phone. By so doing your bravery and courage comes alive.
4. Generating Positive Energy Helps Manage Negative Emotions
To trash out, negative emotions surround yourself with Positive personalities. Who would encourage you to live out your best version?
Also, read, watch, and listen to something that fills your mind with positivity and hope.
5. Consider Others Before Giving in to Negative Emotions
Your emotions may appear superior to your will and you assume you can’t control it. That’s when you should reflect on the effect the outburst of your emotions would have on others. Hence, calm down and subject your emotions to your will.
Conclusion
The signs on how to recognize emotions are useful in detecting our personal feelings at all points in time and telling how others are feeling. From a psychologist’s viewpoint, our environment influences our emotions. Hence, become conscious of the things surrounding you, which your mind is exposed to. Take charge of your emotions.
Perhaps, you have experienced the effect of negative emotions, do well to share in the comment section below.
by Fatima Sheikh | Apr 14, 2021 | Family & Parenting
Unlike most of my articles focusing on tips for adults can looking to improve their soft skills, this article is centered on building confidence in children. In my experience working with children, I have come to realize that children are very interesting beings and there is so much to learn from them than you can imagine. Unlike adults, children are free, adventurous, and confident to do what they want and how they want to. But due to lack of experience, they might require guidance from adults in their lives.
Children are recorders and they watch every move and action adults around them take then replicate that action perfectly. This stage is a very critical stage that determines the type of adult the child is going to become in the future.
As an adult or parent with children around, this sensitive stage in the lives of the children requires constant molding and mentoring. A confident child has more likelihood of being successful at handling life pressure, responsibilities, and negative emotions.
Tips on How to Grow Self-Confidence in Children
1. Be Their Role Model
Being their role model helps in building confidence in children. Be what you want your children to be. The easiest way to make children act a particular way is by being that person yourself. Show them by doing it. Don’t be afraid to show them that it is not easy, but teach them that it is normal to fail and also get up to try again. Walk the walk and see them imitate you.
2. Practice More of Positive Self-Talk
You must be kind and use soft kind words with your children. They might test your patience most of the time and it is easy to use a hurtful word on them. These words can affect their self-confidence even till adulthood.
As an adult, you have to be patient with the children and use positive kind words to encourage them. This helps in building confidence in children.
3. Ensure They Know Your Love is Unconditional
This is a tricky one and the most misunderstood tip by most adults dealing with children. Some adults believe the best way to show a child you love them is by buying them all the gifts in the world or letting them get away with everything. But the best way you can show a child love is by being present, supportive, encouraging, kindly correcting their faults and mistakes, helping them discover their potentials, and molding them to be great adults.
Make sure you let them know you love them. This always builds their self-confidence.
4. Resist Comparing Them to Others
The best way to destroy your child’s confidence is by comparing them to their siblings or other children. This always leaves a scar on the child till adulthood, making them doubt themselves and see themselves as less than others. You should know that every child is unique and beautifully made different. Treat every child in their unique way and appreciate their uniqueness.
This surely helps in building confidence in children.
5. Learners are Leaders
Children are curious and are at a stage in their lives where they enjoy learning and trying out new things. As an adult, you should imbibe the culture of learning in your child. Teach them new skills or enroll them to learn new skills. Learners are naturally ahead of their peers.
6. Failure is a Temporary Block
Teach your children that failure is part of life and the growth journey is full of stumbling blocks. The world is full of adults who cannot accept failure. So, by teaching your children to accept failure, you are building them to be confident adults.
7. Encourage Them to Be Expressive
As an African child, respect is the number one moral attribute taught and encouraged. Teach your children to be expressive in a respectable manner. Decide on strategies to use to express their feelings given their moods and feelings. This will go a long way to build confidence in your children.
Conclusion
When dealing with children and how to build their self-confidence, there are tons and tons of strategies to help them get there. Children are in a delicate stage of their lives where they can be molded to be adults with certain traits. If this stage is gotten right, they can turn out to be great adults.
I hope this article was helpful. What other ways do you think you can boost a child’s self-confidence? Share with me in the comments section below. Thank you.
by Happiness Hassan | Apr 8, 2021 | Family & Parenting
Kids are expressions of the type of family they come from. Hence, it’s easy to detect when a child is brought up from a mannered home or a disorganized home by their behaviours. It’s the responsibility of parents to teach their children the proper way to live in society. This can’t be achieved when there is no bond between parents and their kids. However, there are various activities that help increase parents bonding with kids.
What Activities Increases the Bond Between Parents and Their Children?
1. Deactivate The Strict Mode
Parents in an attempt to discipline their children put on strict, unapproachable looks, most especially fathers. They believe such looks increase the level of honour and respect received from their children. However, this approach imprints fear into your kids and creates separation. Along the line, your kids become secretive about what’s going wrong with them, perhaps share with someone else.
Amina was sexually abused severally by her class teacher who claimed to tutor her for her entrance exams. Amina had no one to run to, not even her mom due to her parent’s unapproachable looks. She decided to retaliate and amid the struggle, he slammed her head against the metal door, she slumped and started bleeding profusely. Amina was taken to the hospital, where she regained her consciousness having received intense treatment.
Afterwards, the doctor discovered other damages done to her reproductive organs. Hence, he called her parents into his office and told them about their daughter’s conditions. Right in front of the doctors, her dad flared up in anger ready to bounce on Amina for living a promiscuous lifestyle at such a tender age.
However, the doctor who had earlier discussed with Amina calmed her parents and further explained how their daughter found herself in such a mess because of their strict behaviour towards her. As parents, they weren’t open to their daughter and that made her secretive about the issue. In essence, become free with your kids to prevent unfortunate future events.
2. Set Rules and Boundaries
This is an antidote to being strict with your kids. It’s helpful when rules are set to regulate your children’s activities. It makes them believe you care for them and want the best for them. For instance, permit your kids to go out and hang out with their friends at a stipulated time.
Due to the boundaries, they tend to return home on time with so much joy to share their experience with you. Hence, to know more about your kids don’t restrict or confine them within the walls of your house.
3. Play With Your Kids
Furthermore, parents bonding with kids is made easier when they play together with their kids. It is true children prefer to hang out with their peers compared to their parents, but it is made possible through the activities they engage in with their parents at home. The togetherness with your kids is strengthened when you play with them.
Such activities could include playing games, visiting recreational places, engaging in sporting activities, and lots more help to foster the bond.
4. Consider Their Opinions
Parents feel they know what’s best for their kids. However, to enhance the bond with your kids consider their perspectives. Be slow to shut them up without hearing the reason behind their choice.
Denying your kids of their freedom of choice decreases their creativity.
Hence, as responsible parents always support your kids. Perhaps, you perceive their choice might endanger them, make them understand through the application of the 7 C’s of communication.
5. Eat Together as a Family
As a family, the bond of love and unity is ignited when eating together. This provides a platform to boost the bond of love. Also, loosen the atmosphere a bit by complementing the meal and some table jokes.
Preferably, during this period offer to dish out the meal for your kids and observe their reaction while they eat. This is particularly more active during breakfast and dinner.
6. Show Love by Saying It
Never assume your kids know how much you love them by paying their bills. Move a step higher and show love through gifts, shopping together, helping with their school works, and engaging in craft activities together. Also, cultivate the habit of cuddling and patting your kids.
Most importantly tell them you love them countless times a day. Show your kids more love when they fail at doing something new, your act of love has the power to encourage them to try again and better. This will help parents in bonding well with their kids.
7. Prioritize Bedtime Stories
This might appear irrelevant, but it works accurately and it’s an effective method that boosts parents bonding with kids. Some of the benefits of bedtime stories include; learning moral lessons, increasing cognitive skills and more.
Seize their bedtime period, hop in bed with them, tell them a story, and say a word of prayers before leaving.
Fortunately, during bedtime stories, kids get to relax and open up to you about how their day went and things bothering them. Therefore, cherish bedtime stories.
8. Work Together With Your Kids
You would get to know more about your kids when you allow them to help around with the house chores. Instead of doing it all alone while your kids stay and watch you or play games, invite them to help you. Give them chores to work on.
Don’t feel as though you are stressing them out. I tell you, it’s a perfect way of grooming your kids to be hardworking and also drawing them closer to you, thereby increasing the bond with them.
9. Teach Them About Their Faith
Don’t abandon your kids to the teaching received from school or a nanny only, although nothing is wrong with learning from school. But, the knowledge communicated is limited and would not expatiate into their faith and belief systems.
Therefore, create time, probably thrice a week to sit with them and discuss at length the things you as a parent believes. This practice opens your kids to other perspectives.
10. Spend Quality Time With Your Kids
Always spend quality time with your kids by balancing your schedule. It is one way to enhance bonding with. When you claim to be busy for your kids they become vulnerable to improper advice from peers and other mediums.
In addition, parents bonding with kids is achievable when you’re always there for them. Most importantly, listen to their needs, and provide a solution to their problem.
Also, Practice a heart-heart chat once in a while with your kids.
11. Minimize Corporal Punishment
Raising kids is tasking to do, as a result of this most parents employ corporal punishment to discipline their children, when they go astray from the expected way of behaviour. However, corporal punishment indirectly creates a separation between you and your kids.
In essence, the level of discipline you give to your children should be maximized, don’t inflict injuries on your child in a bit to punish them for their wrong.
Conclusion
A strong bond between you and your kids can either increase or decrease based on how you treat and interact with your kids. Hence, the above-mentioned steps are ways of boosting the chances of parents bonding with kids. However, don’t become extremely lenient to correct them, to combat this, endeavour to set rules and guidelines to govern your relationship with your kids.
Finally, don’t forget to drop your comments regarding this post below.
by Rebecca Bala | Apr 8, 2021 | Relationships & Weddings
Our evolution into a digital world has been proven to do so much good. The introduction of social media which is known to make our work easy, improve marketing, and connect the world by easing our communication is one innovation we couldn’t be more grateful for. Social media has become an essential part of our lives and imagining a life without it is almost impossible. Does it do any harm? Oh yes! Social media can become catastrophic to our relationships if not managed well and used within limits. Are you wondering how social media ruins relationships? These are 7 ways it can!
1. Social Media Gives Room for Comparison
With the amount of information people put out on the media, it is almost impossible to not want to compare your life with others. You see a girl posting the expensive presents she received from her boyfriend on her birthday and you wonder whether her boyfriend has two heads that your boyfriend cannot do the same.
It can cause you to put unnecessary pressure on your partner and that can cause a strain in your relationship. It fuels discontentment and it makes it difficult for you to be satisfied or pleased. You can lose a good relationship because you wanted to be like someone whose life is probably fake. Every relationship is unique and you have to learn to be content with your partner no matter how imperfect they are.
2. It Breeds Distrust
Looking through the comment section of your partner’s social media page is totally normal but looking through it and seeing comments from a previous love interest or some admirer, opens room for insecurities and distrust.
A lady was getting ready for a dinner with her boyfriend and as she looked through the gram, she saw a comment from her boyfriend’s previous lover. The comment implied that they had met recently and she was mad. She began to undress in fury as different scenarios played through her mind. Is he cheating on me? Did he ever break up with her in the first place?
That relationship ended that night but what the lady didn’t know was that her boyfriend went to see the ex-lover to tell her he was done with her and he was planning to settle with his new partner. This is an example of how social media ruins relationships.
3. It Encroaches in Quality Time
For any relationship to thrive, quality time with your partner is very important. It doesn’t always have to be long but it should be qualitative. Usually, partners use this time to talk, listen, and give each other undivided attention but now, you can find two partners hanging out but they both have their eyes fixed on the phone – probably tweeting or entertaining themselves. Some people may even live together but communicate via text. Consider this scenario:
You are having a nice time with your partner and all they are concerned about is filming it so you both can oppress people online. Instead of actually enjoying the moment, they are busy trying to capture your best moments for the gram.
4. Social Media Deprive You of Your Privacy
Social media ruins your relationships by depriving you of your privacy. The temptation to put all of your business out there for others to see is a hard one to resist. There’s the need to prove to others that your relationship is perfect. Moments that are meant to be Intimate and private become public because of your constant need for validation or public opinion. The problem is that as you keep sharing private things with the public, you create room for other people to give comments on your relationship. Some of those comments are capable of destroying your relationship. Sometimes it puts ideas in your head. And if your partner is a private person, they can get upset if they find out everyone is in their business.
I recently read the story of a popular couple who just ended their engagement and while different rumours were passing round concerning the split up, the bride wrote a message to the public and said these words “please respect our privacy”. I literally screamed too late because the whole of social media folks were already analyzing the situation and giving their opinions on it.
If you want your privacy, do not put your private business out there for everyone to see. Limit what you share.
5. Pressures to Live Up to People’s Expectations
Maintenance of a certain status on social media has become the new norm. Social media says if you are in a relationship you have to cohabit, go on vacations, serenade your partner, and visit exquisite restaurants. Then, you find yourself visiting a very expensive restaurant you do not like and cannot afford because it looks good for the gram. You are starving so you can afford to go on a vacation.
Having to constantly do things for the gram is how social media ruins your relationship.
6. Social Media Increases the Chances of Infidelity
As social media connects you to a lot of people, it also increases your chances of infidelity. There’s little or no control when it comes to posting nudes and provocative pictures making it easy to be attracted to another person. You can just slide into any DM, probably even sext with strangers without your partner finding out. It can also cause you to be emotionally detached from your partner since you now have a new chatting buddy.
7. It Brings about Addiction
Social media can be very addictive. It’s slowly becoming the story of many users. Imagine the first thing your partner does is check their phones and notifications before greeting you good morning. In addition, they are constantly on the phone trying to keep up with the latest news and trends, obsessed with getting every detail of your lives out for everyone to see.
Their screen time is more than the time you spend together talking. They seem to prioritize their fans and followers than you. Not only will this cause conflict, but it can also go as far as ending the relationship.
Conclusion
You can get so carried away with social media that you become oblivious to how social media ruins your relationship and the damages involved. You have to regulate your screen time and have limits to what you put out there. This will help maintain privacy and your sanity as well.
Use the media healthily and responsibly.
I hope you find this article worthwhile. You could also tell us other ways social media ruins relationships. Thank you.
