It is obvious that people are different because we are a product of our mindset, likes, family, environment and so on. We tend to behave or give priority to things depending on how who we are. How a relationship and marriage is, also depends on that. And again, we all want to be with our soulmates eventually, don’t we? In order to ensure a happy relationship or marriage, you need to look out for the below-mentioned signs that you found your soulmate.
Let’s go right into them!
Signs to Look Out on to Ascertain If You’ve Found Your Soulmate or Not
1. You Share Almost the Same Likes and Dislikes
One of the signs that you found your soulmate is when you have almost the same likes and dislikes. You should put it at the back of your mind that it’s not possible for you to find someone having exactly the same likes and dislikes as you, but make sure they have the majority of your likes, most especially what you know you can’t compromise on.
Check if they like doing the things that you love to do during your leisure time. More so, check if they have the same passion for something that means so much to you like you. Ascertain whether or not they are good to go on this aspect.
You found your soulmate if they have the greater percentage of your likes and dislikes. If not, most especially on the most important ones to you, you haven’t. I advise you to search elsewhere.
2. You Have a Compatible Genotype
Genotype is one of the tests that every couple intended to settle down should undergo or take. Ascertain whether or not if you guys are compatible by taking the test. If the result turns out to be AA + AA, you are good to go, AA + AS, good to go, and AA + SS, good to go as well. However, if it turns out to be AS + AS, it’s a disaster, AS + SS is an atomic bomb, while SS + SS is a weapon of mass destruction.
So, if the result comes out in your favour, you have found your soulmate in that aspect, nevertheless, if it isn’t, you haven’t.
The result of this test is very paramount because it will affect the children you both are going to have. In general, if you are AA, you can marry any person with any other genotype, but if you are AS or SS, make sure you look for someone with AA to settle down with, else, the possibility of giving birth to children with sickle cell is very high.
You wouldn’t want that, would you?
3. You Have the Same Idea of a Family
The idea of what a family differs from one person to another. To some, a family is one with a husband and wife with many children while it’s the one with fewer children to some. Others may see it as one comprising of just a husband and wife without any children.
Regardless of how people see it, ensure that the person you intend to settle down with has the same idea of a family like you. I beg you not to compromise on this in order to avoid a lot of ugliness later.
Congratulations if you’ve found your kind of person in this regard. This is surely one of the signs that you found your soulmate.
4. They Are as Religious/Social as You
This is another very important sign to look out for if you want to know whether or not you have found your soulmate. Check out if they are as religious as you or as social as you’re. If they are, you’ve found your soulmate, and you haven’t if otherwise.
As a religious person, you will love to have a family that your religion’s ethics and rules are the ones governing the affairs of your family and nothing else. And as a social person, you would love to be spontaneous; the traditional or western ways of life will be your choice of how you want your family to be. You wouldn’t want something else, would you?
I pray the one you find will be your type.
5. Their Family’s Ethics Are Just like Yours
The kind of family one is brought up in has a great influence on the kind of person they turn out to be, mostly. Whatever is obtainable in your family is what you see as normal and any other way is abnormal. This is because each and every family have their ethics and the way they do things.
For instance, in most northern family settings, strangers are not allowed into houses without any permission. Even with permission, you can’t just barge into the house without any prior notice that you will. In some other families, you are free to come in and go out of a house as you please.
Regardless of how your family is, as long as that’s exactly what you want, ensure you find someone with the same type of family. If you find that kind of person, you know they are your soulmate in this aspect, and not if otherwise.
6. If You Happen to See a Friend in Them
Your partner is someone who is expected to be your friend. Relationships that began with friendship tends to last longer than those that didn’t. If they are your friend, they will tend to understand you more; you can also laugh, play, and crack jokes together – do a lot of fun things together. Life is too short so why don’t we just enjoy it while it lasts?
If you don’t’ find a friend in them, all those listed cool stuff cannot be achievable. The house is going to be so boring. Trust me.
Ensure they are your friend and not just your partner. This is undoubtedly one of the signs that you found your soulmate.
7. When They Are Very Caring
The heart tends to love the person that cares for it. Your partner is caring to you if they care and support you in whatever positive thing that you do. This behaviour is aimed at reducing your distress or problems and supporting you in coping with your efforts in situations of either threat or challenge. It also entails them preserving and protecting your wellbeing regardless of whether they are accompanied by care and concern or not.
In marriages, there are lots of ups and downs – misunderstandings and fights, happy moments and miserable ones. If they are caring, they will make you feel more valuable and loved in happy moments and less miserable in moments of distress.
Therefore, if your partner is caring enough, then you have found your soulmate. If it’s otherwise, I advise you to quit the relationship.
8. They Always Put You First
We all have lots of things to do which are very important. Well, the idea of how ‘important’ something is to one differ from one person to another depending on how they see it. Regardless, however busy they are, they must try and create time for you and just you. You should also be at the top of their preference list. This excludes situations where they need to put you behind some things.
For instance, they have this promotion examination in their workplace and you need them close to you because you are somewhat ill or lonely. Or say, they have school fees to pay or house rent and you need to buy an item of clothing for pleasure or whatever reason it is. Of course, those problems surpass yours.
In general, you should always be put first in whatever is obviously less important than you. If they always put on one complaint or other to avoid you, you haven’t found your soulmate yet. However, if they always put you first, my dear, you have found your soulmate.
9. They Appreciate Your Every Little Effort
Everyone needs to be shown gratitude whenever they do something good. Your partner should always appreciate your every effort however little it may be. For instance, when you stock her store with foods stuff, buy her fancy clothes, or even pay her bills – even though it’s kind of your responsibility, she should be grateful and show appreciation towards that effort. And as a lady, when you make up for him, dress and smell nice, buy him gifts on occasions of relevance to him, he should thank you enough too.
This is surely one of the signs that you found your soulmate.
Soulmates are trucks of joy. They are the best things that can ever happen to anyone. If you’ve been with one before, or know someone who is with their soulmate, you surely will testify this assertion.
I advise before you embark on any relationship or marriage, ensure you look out for the above-mentioned signs that you have found your soulmate. As I said, you can’t find someone exactly like you, nowhere in the world does that kind of person exist. However, ensure they have the majority of the mentioned attributes.
Kindly tell us what you feel about this and also tells us other signs one can tell that they have found their soulmate in the comments section below.
Have you been pondering over the things you need to know or do before marriage? If yes, you’re at the right place! Just stay with me as I guide you through some marriage preparation tips.
Most of the marriages that crumbled, crumbled not because the couples aren’t in love, but because they failed to know some things that they ought to have known before even settling down. You wouldn’t want to have a failed marriage, would you?
The moment you decide to marry, know that you have embarked on a journey and there are important things to know and take along with you. Here are some marriage preparation tips to guide you through this journey:
Marriage Preparation Tips
1. Make Up Your Mind
This may sound easy, but trust me, if you carelessly overlook it, you will have yourself to blame.
Making up one’s mind is about coming to terms with their mind; they have to be on the same page. You can’t want to do something while your mind is thinking differently.
You do not want to prepare for a marriage you are not confident in, or still have lingering doubts about; this is a strong factor that could lead to failure in marriages.
2. Pray About It
Having made your mind up on settling down, as normal or conventional as it may sound, you need to pray. The northern part of Nigeria is arguably the most religious part of the country – Islam and Christianity and the two major religions. Both religions believe that whenever you set your mind on doing something, only your efforts or hard work won’t suffice, you also have to pray about it.
After all, marriage is not like an item of clothing, when it gets old or no longer fits you, you discard or give it to another person, NO. It’s a lifetime something. You need God’s interference, don’t you?
Prayer is the key to everything. So pray!
3. Discuss Responsibilities
To avoid responsibility clashes here and there, you need to discuss responsibilities.
There are of course responsibilities in every household. There is a need for you two to discuss and share those responsibilities. Some responsibilities are peculiar to men (like fending for the family) while others are to females (like childbearing, tidying up the house, etc.), and some are for both.
However you decide to share, it is ok as long as no one feels overburdened or cheated. Ensure to make it very clear.
You could also read on: Managing Shared Responsibilities.
4. Have a Role Model Couple
Having a role model is one of the marriage preparation tips you need to put into consideration. That role model could be some influential persons, friends, relatives, or even your parents. You chose them because they’ve been in marriage for a long time and have amassed themselves with a wealth of marital experiences.
They will come in handy when you have a problem with your spouse that needs to be resolved.
5. Try to Be Independent
In a typical northern Nigerian setting, a wife is a very dependent being. She engages in little or no productive stuff but is very productive when it comes to demand. As a female, you do not want to be that; your husband will love you less.
Most men nowadays do not even want a dependent woman, we prefer an independent woman – a woman who does some things for herself and can come to the aid of the family when the need arises. Unfortunately, some men nowadays have their eyes on their partner’s money. Guys, when you become too demanding, she gets tired of you too – it’s a two-way thing.
My advice for you is, try as much as possible to be independent.
Related:How Being Independent Can Keep You From Breaking Up.
6. Take a Genotype Test
Genotype is the genetic makeup of an individual passed from his parents. We have 4 types of genotypes: AA, AS, SS, AC. As an AA, you can marry any person regardless of their genotype – as a matter of fact, it is more advisable to not marry an AA, but any other genotype.
You and your partner must go for this test and be sure you two are compatible. If you aren’t, forget about that marriage. I know it’s not easy, but it’s better than what you will face in the future.
Go for that test NOW if you haven’t.
7. Be Yourself
Being you as one of the marriage preparation tips is paramount for a successful marriage. Do not be deceptive, show your true self – this doesn’t imply that if you have a bad habit, keep it, NO, change it. Let your partner get to know the real you so they don’t see someone different in you that they already know after marriage.
A piece of advice from me to you is “Never lie to satisfy somebody for a moment because the pain that you cause them in the future can last them for a lifetime”.
Please, be YOURSELF!
8. Mind Your Expenditure
One of the marriage preparation tips I’ll be sharing with you is ‘being mindful of your expenditure‘ – this is mostly for men. You need to know that you are about venturing into something way different from the life of a single person. Scale-preference your needs and concentrate on only the important ones.
Do not be tempted to go overboard when spending. Begin to train yourself to spend wisely, that skill will come in handy in your marital life.
9. Decide on Family Size
Deciding on the size of the family you both need or want is an important marriage preparation tip. You should know that a large family size comes with greater responsibilities and vice-versa.
Decide on the number of children you intend to have, and advisably, that should be proportionate to your income and available time – you need money to take care of the family needs and your children need your time as well.
Please, do not give birth to children you cannot cater for; that would be a very cruel thing to do to your children and society at large.
10. Be Obedient and Respectful
You need to be obedient and respectful to your partner. This mostly goes to females. You need to know that we men have ego and pride the size of Mount Everest. We, humans, want to be obeyed and respected by people or our subordinates, but for men, hmm, it’s something else. My dear future bride, have that obedience and respect coming your husband’s way non-stop.
Do not relent on this, DO NOT!
11. Stop Thinking Me, but Us
You need to know that marriage involves two people doing things together for the whole of their lives. As a result, you need to stop thinking about yourself whenever you want to do or say something, you should always consider your partner’s wishes and wants as well. Considering each other not only avoids unpleasant situations but strengthens your marriage beyond negative external forces.
12. Avoid Pre-Marital Sex
This is a big one. In the modern-day world, pre-marital sex has become a normal thing. Unfortunately, some tribes in Nigeria encourage it. However, it isn’t a good practice. There are repercussions to the act.
It brings about less trust in your partner on the issue (sex). You will be suspecting your partner whenever you see them with the opposite sex or when they are not around – say, when they come back home late, or when they are on a business or an official trip. And ‘trust’ my dear, is very important in a marriage. The moment you start suspecting your partner, that marriage is dead already.
Another advantage of not having pre-marital sex is that you don’t get to have a preference, whatever and however your man or woman is, you will be content, mostly.
So, my advice for you is, DON’T engage in pre-marital sex.
13. You Need to Be Patient
Whether it’s marriage or business, patience is the first rule of successWilliam Feather
One of the marriage preparation tips worth noting is ‘being patient’. There are lots of ups and downs in marriages. No marriage is free from troubles and hurdles. You have to find a way to deal with them as they come, and the best way to achieve that is by being patient with your partner and your marital life.
14. Test Their Patience Too
You will need to know how patient your partner is in terms of misunderstanding. For me, the best way to do that is by getting in a good fight – a very good one intentionally, and then see how they react. If they react favourably, then go for them, and if they react violently, I suggest you leave them. Do you know why? Because there are lots of ugly fights waiting for you in marriage, you do not want to take them (the fights) lightly.
15. Talk about Faith (Religion)
Before venturing into any marriage, talk about religious beliefs with your partner. It’s much easier if you’re both practicing the same religion because all you need to do is decide when and how religious practices should be carried out in the family. If you practice different faiths, you seriously need to have that talk.
Religion is a very sensitive thing now. Ensure that you set boundaries you both should not cross and respect each other’s faith. Any mistake could be disastrous. You should also decide on the faith of your children, the earlier you do that, the better.
You could also read on: Why Setting Boundaries in a Relationship is Important
16. Learn to Forgive
Another important marriage preparation tip worth practicing is ‘forgiveness’. Whenever your spouse upsets you and asks for forgiveness, forgive them. Forgive them even if they don’t ask for it, at least, so you could have a rest of mind.
Do not continue to dwell on previous mistakes of your partner because more are coming. When the problems become much, you lose control of yourself. So, forgive them to have a healthy marriage.
17. Be a Supporter
As a future husband, know that you need to support your future wife in terms of providing for her basic needs, and in whatever good she’s doing. And as a future wife, you need to be like a backup plan for your husband – be that kind of wife that your husband can rely on or fall back to when he is down financially or emotionally.
Support each other in good and unfortunate times.
There are tons of marriage preparation tips, some of which I haven’t included in my write-up – like trust, honesty, being faithful, trustworthy, etc. This is because I didn’t want to bore you with a lot to read. Notwithstanding, the above-mentioned tips should be enough guide for you to consider before tying the knot.
If you find this article interesting, please leave a comment on the comments section below, and also tell us other marriage preparation tips I haven’t mentioned. Thank you.
You could also read on: 10 Things Every Marriage Needs and 10 Things to Do at the Start of Every Relationship.
There are different ways to tell if someone likes you or not, but you have to be very careful not to misinterpret peoples’ gestures. Any mistake could be very embarrassing and in some cases, disastrous.
Knowing if someone likes you or not can be easy, difficult, or tricky depending on your intellect and observation skills. Nevertheless, if you want to know whether or not someone likes you, in general, here are some signs to look out for:
Ways You Can Tell They Like You
1. They like to Be Wherever You Are
It is normal for one to like to be close to their crush. There is this feeling of satisfaction they get when they are close to you. They mustn’t necessarily be beside you to feel that, but your presence in the environment they are in suffices.
2. They Make Eye Contact
One of the ways to tell if someone likes you is by making eye contact with you frequently. Making eye contact with someone could either be mistakenly or intentionally. In this case, it’s intentional; you know it is when your eyes meet and they tend to take it off you immediately and put them back on when you look away.
3. They Feel Secure
This is only applicable to ladies. There is this sense of security a lady feels when she is with the man she loves. She can go as far as been disrespectful to someone in your presence knowing that you will be there to defend her.
4. They Always Want to Hear from You
You can tell they like you when they talk to you too often physically, or send you messages or call you on your cellphone regularly. When you meet, they tell you how happy they are when they communicate with you, or you get to hear that from their close friends or family.
5. They Like Whatever You Like
If he/she is an acquaintance, they tend to like whatever you show interest in and dislike whatever you dislike that they initially do not care about. And if he/she isn’t an acquaintance, they like or dislike what you are interested in, naturally.
6. They Always Start a Conversation
Since they want to spend more time with you, they will want to converse with you more often, thus, initiating a conversation almost always at the slightest opportunity they get. They can start with any question that pops up in their head even if the aura isn’t right.
It happened to me when I was chatting with a lady some time ago, she said “Hi” and I responded, then we started conversing and there was a pause because we ended the conversation we were having. We were both online and the next thing, she sent another “Hi”. It’s obvious she wanted a piece of my time but didn’t even know how to initiate a new conversation.
It might interest you to read on 16 Tips on How to Keep a Conversation Going With Someone You Like
7. Wanting to Know More about You
Your crush will always want to gather sufficient information about you (for those who are interested in a committed relationship) to know if you two are compatible or not.
They tend to ask questions like “Do you have any brothers or sisters?”, “What are your likes and dislikes?”, “What is your ideal kind of wife?” etc. The questions may be even personal as they get to know you more.
8. Not Acting Normal
One of the ways to tell if someone likes you is when they start acting weird around you. In the case of ladies, they begin to play with their hair and/or smile and laugh at anything you say or do, and for guys, they begin to overdo things around you – things to impress you like trying so hard to be funny.
9. They Find Everything You Say Hilarious
This is most common among ladies. Whatever you say is funny even if it is not. You know, there is the weird sound a fake laughter sounds. You can easily detect it without even trying.
10. They Keep Track of Everything You Do
You can tell they like you when they can remember every little detail about you – things that you may have forgotten you told them. Sometimes, they even remember
They remember the relationship between you and every friend of yours that you have introduced them to and/or told them about, so also, your close relatives and anyone around you. In addition, they can even remind you of your monthly cycle or your college lecture schedule!
They can do all of that and more without stress whatsoever.
11. If They Smile Unnecessarily
Furthermore, one of the ways you can tell if someone likes you is when they smile unnecessarily.
By just staring at you, you find them smiling, sometimes, uncontrollably. I believe you must have experienced that with someone you were or are into.
In a conversation, they smile not because what you are saying is interesting or you are that attractive or funny, but they just find themselves doing so subconsciously – you can tell by obvious signs of them not paying attention to you.
12. They Have Told Their Friend(s) about You
When a guy or girl likes you, they wouldn’t mind telling the world about you, most especially their friends and family. When that gets to your hearing, know that they are into you. This is one of the ways to tell if someone likes you.
13. They Tell You Personal Details about Themselves:
Personal details about one are shared with someone you are very close to like a trusted friend or family relation, usually. Because they are into you and want you to be a part of their world, they share with you. Personal details like their family problems or their sexuality are very personal stuff in the Northern part of Nigeria, notwithstanding, they tell you.
14. They Find Excuses to Touch You
You can tell they like you when they try to touch you at every slightest opportunity they have got, though not common in the North compared to other regions in the country, some people do that. They always try to sit close to you or ask you to play a game that requires you to be close to them like Ludo or Whot. Your company is what they never stop craving for.
15. They Communicate Freely
Normally, you find yourself communicating freely without someone you ordinarily like not to talk of someone you are crushing on. They are not too mindful or choosy of what they say or discuss with you.
Personally, I tend to find women easier to read than men. Both sexes are driven by different things. Ladies are mostly emotionally unstable compared to men, thus, leaving them more vulnerable to be noticed by men. Regardless, just know that you have to be very careful in your judgement.
If you find this article interesting, kindly leave a comment below, and also share with us if you think there is/are point(s) I omitted. Thank you.
Related: This is How You Make Your Crush Like You and 10 Signs that Show You Are in a One-Sided Relationship